Sideswipe
A daily look at life's oddities by Ana Samways

Sideswipe: February 13: Retirement no fun zone

8 comments
"Seems the folks at this Pakuranga retirement home aren't allowed to have ANY fun!" writes a reader.
"Seems the folks at this Pakuranga retirement home aren't allowed to have ANY fun!" writes a reader.

Preacher outs himself as rainbow worrier

The rainbow has become a symbol of LGBT inclusivity and tolerance but evangelical preacher Ken Ham wants to "reclaim" the "true meaning" of the rainbow. His Kentucky Ark Encounter Park features a replica of Noah's Ark with animatronic animals and, during Christmas, the park lights up the Ark with rainbow colours, as a one-off "treat". Last week Ham announced that the park will "enhance the rainbow lights and make them a permanent feature during evenings at the Ark". Far from being a symbol of gay pride, Ham insists that the rainbow symbolises the fact that "God judged sin with a global flood, but that He promises never to judge again with a global flood - the final judgment will be by fire."
(Source: Dangerous Minds)

The damaging truth about toilet roll hanging

John from Green Bay writes: "Mike Hosking was pontificating on Seven Sharp on whether people mount their toilet rolls with the paper coming off the front, or back of the roll [didn't Paul Henry cover this already?].

He suggested it was a random choice people made. Little does he realise that there is a logical reason for having the paper come off the front of the roll [do tell, John!] when it comes off the back of the roll, the finger nails of the user, over time, damage the wallpaper/paint on the wall of the loo directly behind the toilet roll."

Jesus is back, and this time ... It's personal. (Source: oddstuffmagazine.com)
Jesus is back, and this time ... It's personal. (Source: oddstuffmagazine.com)

Malapropisms

1. Some friends of ours told us they were going to get a Muriel painted on their living room wall. Another fisherman friend of mine told me he'd caught an octopus and was going to batter and deep fry its technicals (ouch!!)

2. On our anniversary my husband suggested we go out to a favourite cafe for "Coffee and Balaclava"!

3. In a cafe she asked the waiter for some dromedary sugar for her coffee. Quick as a flash the waiter asked if she'd like one hump or two?

4. A friend's elderly Austrian mother had some interesting takes on a few English phrases and idioms. Two of my favourites were: It's nearer as the cow flies. And speaking of a recent accident outside her home, she remarked how quickly the rescue team had cut the driver out of his car with the jars of life.

5. My wife came out with this "I may not be the smartest tool in the shed but I am pretty". I agreed, she made a convincing point.

A Newspaper in the Dominican Republic used a picture of Alec Baldwin instead of Donald Trump.
A Newspaper in the Dominican Republic used a picture of Alec Baldwin instead of Donald Trump.

Good read: Best dance moves for ladies.

Good read: "Australians eat a million Domino's pizzas every week. But, when you lift the lid, many of its people are struggling to make a crust. So how does this stockmarket juggernaut really operate?" Read the full story here.

Video: The Last Supper (with a contemporary feel)

Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

- NZ Herald

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