The first rule of Singlespeed Race Club? If you don't want the tattoo, don't win.
Rule 2: If you're not first woman or man, you will be second equal (so don't ask for your time or placing).
One other thing. You don't need to be a singlespeeder to enter the Singlespeed World Championships on November 18.
One-gear your bike on the day so you can enjoy the event of the year. Rotorua hosted in 2010 and a surprisingly high percentage of the 600 Kiwis who entered did just that. In 2017, this will be the second and last time you'll be able to enter a Singlespeed World Championship in Rotorua (or New Zealand, probably). There's no need to qualify. It's first in, first served.
It's good value, too. For $111, you'll get a race on the impeccable trails of the world-celebrated Whakarewarewa Forest, a stylish T-shirt designed by Gary Sullivan from Nzo, beers (some on-course), a post-race party and Big Kiwi Brekkie at the Pig and Whistle - and a very good time.
Singlespeed events in our town are very well supported by local businesses. Nduro Events is the race director.
Two bike frames are up for grabs - steel by Jeffson Bikes and bamboo by Freddy Salgado (he's from Gisborne, but an honorary Rotoruan). There's swag from Agroventures, Dancing Moose Cycling Adventure Supplies, Helibike Rotorua, Off-Road New Zealand, QE Health Wellness and Spa, Rotorua Canopy Tours and YHA Rotorua.
Rotorua Lakes Council is a supporter and the Rotorua Trails Trust will be the main beneficiary.
Singlespeeding can be a bit 'in-crowd'. The Rotorua Singlespeed Society takes a different stance. They want everyone to have a crack and enjoy the simplicity, elegance, adrenalin rush - and sheer joy - of one-speed mountain biking.
Media support for Rotorua singlespeed events has always been strong. It's still amazing, heartwarming and gratifying - humbling, even - to get the sort of response this year's event has already received from New Zealand Mountain Biker, Spoke, Sportzhub, Australian Mountain Bike, Flow Mountain Bike and Pinkbike.
The result in 2010 could not have been scripted with local and New Zealand singlespeed legend Garth Weinberg winning the men's event and Australian Heather Logie the women's.
New Zealand has a rich history in the event. Clint Jackson won in 2004 in Castlemaine in Australia, Weinberg in 2010, Denmark-based Angus Edmond in Italy in 2014 and Japan in 2015, and Tadeas Medr, last year in Melbourne.
Numbers will be limited in 2017, so enter at www.sswc2017Rotorua.nz
Be part of history.
The Rotorua Trails Trust working bee, tomorrow at 9am, will focus on Tahi, one of the Whakarewarewa network's originals. Tahi is 'one' in Maori and the trail is the first in from the main trailhead at Waipa.
Tools are provided or BYO. There are snacks and drinks, thanks to Holiday Inn Rotorua, plus a beverage and sandwich at Mountain Bike Rotorua after the dig. And if you sign in you'll be in the draw for a 30-day pass for the thermal Rachel Pools at QE Health Wellness and Spa.
If you can't make it, never mind. It's only $5 to join the Trust. Don't be cheap, make a difference: rotoruatrailstrust.co.nz/join